This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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