Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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