Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize