I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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