All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize