do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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