3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
