she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
