i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
