I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
worst night to have a conscience
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize