Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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