D3 body, D1 cock
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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