time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
