I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
