don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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