I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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