just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
