I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
