Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
