YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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