Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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