people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
