Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
