i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
