Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
