i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
this hospital has no fireball
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
