I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
