dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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