he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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