Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
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