You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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