is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
