what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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