You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
