can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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