She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
