this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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