I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
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