Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
