It was confusing and full of hummus
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize