I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize