I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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