Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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