I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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