Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
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