The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
he fucked my hip out of place.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
