i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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