i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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