youre lurking in front of me
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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