you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
