i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
